There’s a new reality show on the block and it’s called Married at
First Sight. That’s right, these “contestants” have all agreed to
legally marry a stranger who, based on the show’s expert opinions and
calculations, is their scientifically compatible soul mate. The new
reality show follows six New York City singles who are ready to say I do
in a veritable arranged marriage in the hopes of finding their true
love. But that’s not where the show ends- these singles have also agreed
to then allow these same camera crews to document the four weeks
following the wedding, where they’ll have to decide whether they want to
stay together or get a divorce.
Clearly being that this is a reality show these singles- in my humble
opinion- have more than finding LOVE in their starry eyes- i.e.- each
one is looking for their 15 minutes of fame in the hopes of either: a)
getting their own spin-off reality show and nabbing the brass ring of
Reality Star personality or b)Using this show as their springboard for
endorsing diet pills. And if I have learned anything about reality TV it
is this- IT IS NOT REALITY- it is a carefully scripted unreality that
is intended to be appear as though these situations were not contrived
and choreographed by a gaggle of behind-the-scenes production
assistants.
So, while I probably will not be watching the show- I think the
premise is an interesting one to contemplate. Is there such a thing at
Love at first sight? Can an arranged marriage actually go the distance
and lead to a long and fulfilling relationship? I don’t believe in love
at first sight- I believe in lust at first sight which some might
interpret as love. But real in-the-trenches-I -have-your-back-and-I-am
sticking-with-you-even-though-
sometimes-it-feels-like-I-want-to-throttle-you love; that cannot be
achieved instantly. That kind of love and commitment takes years to
develop and is a result of weathering a myriad of experiences together
and coming through them not unscathed but still committed to one
another.
#1 True love is a product of making hard decisions as a team and sticking by them and each other regardless of the outcome.
#2 True love in a relationship begins when you allow yourself to be
completely vulnerable with another person without fear that they will
manipulate your most unguarded and raw state of being.
#3 True love in a relationship begins when you put yourself in a
situation that you would otherwise never consider- because you know it
is important to your partner.
#4 True love is standing beside your partner as they take dive off a
cliff into an unknown-be it a new career or the beginning or end stages
of an illness and you hold onto their hand for dear life because you
don’t want them to take their journey alone.
#5 True love is about saying things in desperate anger that could
damage the very fabric of your relationship- and yet accepting your
partners’ forgiveness, when forgiveness feels extra-ordinarily hard to
manage.
Ultimately when it comes to marriage whether it is arranged or not-
true love in a marriage develops over time and is not about lust,
attraction or how much time you have known this person- rather it is
when you cannot see your life without your partner for better or worse.
RADARS................RADIATING LIGHT FOR OTHER TO SEE
RADARS................RADIATING LIGHT FOR OTHER TO SEE
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